Wednesday, August 21, 2013

It's been a flurry of activity on the medical front.

I've been with Penny for over 22 years, and during that time, I have spent many moments at her side regarding tests, surgeries, and treatment (and also my children, especially my daughter). During that time period, I have been the one who hasn't seen the doctor much, let alone having only 1 surgical procedure in the past 22 years (so it is weird being the person that is getting all of the tests done on them over multiple days).

I really don't know how to feel about such things when I am the person being treated/tested, as usually when I've been there supporting others.... it has usually followed with strife and difficulty so when possible, so I usually avoid them given what I went through as a child. I couldn't really put myself in their shoes knowing what they were going through as I didn't have an adult perspective of such things.

I'll explain.

When I was 5 years old, I had walking pneumonia (and I spent 2 weeks in the hospital during which I spent time with very old people who were very ill.... people who were groaning or snoring all of the time). I was surrounded by a plastic tent (meant to keep me in an oxygenated environment I believe) and was getting many injections with very large needles. During that time, I also celebrated my 6th birthday. Needless to say, the experience was both positive (I loved the doctors and nurses) and negative (I was surrounded by illness) and as a very young impressionable boy, it has played a long term role in my life in my trying to avoid hospitals, doctors, and dentists. it also cemented my strong relationship with my mother (who was there for me despite having a job to go to during that time). I learned how to tell time, learned flirting skills regarding the nursing staff, learned how to use a wheelchair, and became enamored with every '60's sitcom that was being rerun at that time (especially Bewitched and I love Lucy)..... but I digress.

So, to see my wife Penny being there with me and for me (and being strong for me)... especially when she is in the fight of her life against bladder cancer.... is so very humbling to me. The last person in "my corner" was my mother (it didn't matter how much I screwed up or was hurt, she always was there). She was as pure a liberal as they come (from a family of liberals) and she wondered sometimes who raised me given my conservative leanings... but that never stopped her from supporting me through thick and thin (a true hero in my life). It has been almost 4 long years since my mother has passed and I miss her so much, so it is with incredulity that I find my wife being in my corner the same way (and am so very thankful to be blessed 3 times in my life with strong women... the primary influence during my childhood being my Grandmother - Helen Fletre and my mother and now my wife). Blessed am I.

So I have had many tests done (a total of 10 different blood tests so far), x-rays to determine the present condition of my feet and ankles (regarding their degenerative condition) and depending on the results of those, a possible spinal tap and MRI (to exclude Multiple Sclerosis.... yup, that is a possibility considering my symptoms). I am going into therapy tomorrow and meeting a former co-worker later in the day, so things are looking up and I am enjoying each day on my own personal journey of healing.

On another note, I came across a few pictures from back when I was in the Marine Corps, so if anyone is wondering why I have been enamored with logistics my entire life, this picture should explain why.


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